Thursday, July 31, 2008

Stunted Growth

My man-servant and I are spelunking in southern Mexico. The Blood Caves of Oaxaca are lonely, and they do not have reliable wi-fi. If not for a friendly bat to which I tied this message, you wouldn't even be reading this post.

That being said, the solitude of the caves reminds me of the time my stunt dick Jerry tried to kill me by trapping me in a closet for two weeks. Later, as I was beating Jerry to death with his giant penis, I began to feel pity.

What kind of man becomes a stunt dick? Is he someone that wakes up one day with a huge penis only to realize that his face is too ugly for hardcore pornography? What a sad and terrible fate that is.

Who knows if and when I'll be able to post next. My man servant tells me that not all of the bats are as friendly as little Consuela.


B.E. Earl said...

Watch out for the bat guano!

slappy said...

Wait, if you're in Mexico, who's unconscious on the floor in HQ? I put your pants on that guy.

I'm sorry, Jiggs. I'll buy you another pair of pants. Again.