Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Are we animals?

Yesterday the computer guys at work discovered that a hacker had broken into our servers, presumably to steal data packets or electrons or something. My guess is that al Qaeda desperately needs technology to measure airborne particulate pollution. So for an entire day we had no connection to the Internet. No news, weather, sports, or even JiggsCasey.com. As far as work goes, that also meant that I couldn't get any journal articles or quotes for ordering parts. Granted, it was Monday so I wasn't doing any of that work stuff, but it had the potential to completely stall my day.

A general malaise swept over the company. Around 9 am people realized they couldn't read the news over their coffee, so they aimlessly roamed the halls. A little later howls of frustration rose as people couldn't check whatever piece of data they needed online. After lunch we had replaced the fluorescent lighting with torches dipped in whale oil, and a small contingent had abandoned Excel in favor of chiseling data on stone tablets.


Today, all has returned to normal - except we had to change our passwords. My guess is that with this many scientists and engineers, at least one is a big Spaceballs fan with "12345" as their password. Although many are still using stone tablets because it makes better looking graphs than Excel. (nerd joke!)

8 comments:

Ɯbermilf said...

Excel sucks!

B.E. Earl said...

I hate having to change my passwords. Probably because I have the memory of a titmouse in the latter stages of senility.

Carl Spackler said...

you should have left work and gone to the bar. either that or head out to your car and masturbate.

slappy said...

Ubie: Down with Excel! We use Igor more out here. Cool looking graphs and it sounds badass.

Earl: It's the introduction of $!%& characters that gets me. I want my retinal scan/thumbprint reader, dammit!

Carl: What I should have done is split the difference and headed out to the bar to masturbate.

miss kendra said...

we have thumbprints for the building and rooms etc, but we have to change all our passwords ever 60 days. it BLOWS because i can never remember for the first week or so.

TastyMcJ said...

I think we're going to change our password at the house. It's getting embarassing telling our friends and loved ones that come to visit that our passphrase has the word 'fuck' and the number '69' in it.

TastyMcJ said...

Oh, for our wireless router. Not to get in to the house.

though that would be cool.

jamwall said...

As a techie, I get the occasional Excel question at work. At that point I usually pretend that I don't speak English.