Tuesday, October 10, 2006

The modern dance club

I haven’t been clubbing in about six years, but due to a friend’s birthday and being on the VIP list, I figured, “What the hell” and entered a dance club in San Francisco for the first time in years. It was an interesting experience, to say the least.

First off, the music in the club hasn’t changed in six years. They were still playing the same stuff we had at my 8th grade dance, only with a strong techno/house beat mixed in. Perhaps it was retro night. Or perhaps it is because no good dance music has been produced in 15 years. Who knows?

The other thing I saw was only what could be described as a strange sexual act. There was this girl there wearing a fairly short skirt. She would randomly walk up to guys, bend over at the waist and put her hand on the floor, and then rub her ass in their crotch. I believe this was her way of saying hello.

One of the guys was particularly receptive, so they started dancing. And by dancing I mean they started acting out other sexual positions. First, she put her leg up on his shoulder and started gyrating, and then she actually pulled her skirt up and basically started dry-humping the guy right in the middle of the dance floor.

Can someone please explain this phenomenon to me? Please? I guess I wouldn’t mind so much except that the people doing it were not particularly attractive.


miss kendra said...

you have no idea.

had you been at my birthday party, you would have seen some crazy shit.

i have a whole opinion on things of this nature, but it's too upsetting.

i'm just going to leave now.

The Husband said...

i bet you that guy took that whore home and banged the shit out of her.

the fact that she wasn't attractive would make me puke.

in situations like that i start drinking heavily and work the room until some girl gives into my advances and we have sex.

what the fuck is wrong with me.

Nick said...

that's more action than I've had in years. and by "years", I mean "ever".

Übermilf said...

Maybe she was itchy and was out of Vagisil.

Kevin said...

that guy she was gyrating on was ME, man. fuck.

Tits McGee said...

I had something to say, but Übie's comment made me laugh so hard, I've forgotten what it was.

word verification: nickc

Kat said...

Yes. ubie has the best answer.

Friends of McDougal said...

In some species, that's how the bitch "presents."

For humans, it has historically been slightly more subtle (e.g. they pretend to trip over your wallet and fall "accidentally" kick you in the mouth and fish your keys out of your pocket with their high heeled boots)

But this damn generation Y with their itchy asses and deviant sexual norms.

Jesus Lord Christ, is this what equal rights have come to?

I don't think the unattractive are a protected class, which means you can shoot them in any season.

Especially when they're in heat.

God knows, we don't want them reproducing.

Have you ever seen those doggy diapers?

If you're going to be in situations like this, you're probably going to have to start carrying one.

amera hearts said...

I have to go with the majority. Tits comment was the best!

Carl's comment made me laugh as well. Carl getting some? That's laughable!

Monkey said...

I concur with Übermilf. My first thought was "perhaps she had an itch to scratch."

I'm sorry you had to see that Booty. I'll get you some eye wash right away.

Booty J Patrol said...

Miss K: If you'd like to write up your opinion, we'll publish it here.

Carl: Yeah, he probably did give her a good once-over. And there is nothing wrong with you -- your behavior is the side effect of having a penis.

Nick: I'm sorry. You should hang around in dance clubs and maybe you'd get more action.

Uber: Perhaps. I hadn't thought about that. And you're awesome!

Kevin: I don't think that was you. The guy was more "ethnic".

Tits: Did I mention Ubie is awesome?

Kat: Tru Dat.

FOM: It reminded me of when we tried to breed our dog.

Amera: Agreed, Ubie had an awesome comment. Awesome I say.

Monkey: It was ok. The girlfriend and I had a good laugh watching the spectacle from high above (we were on the VIP deck above the dance floor).

ugly people against ugliness said...

Look as a person who lost her looks a long time passing, I cannot say it is right to say looks are the issue here. That could end up with me taking u to the high court. When I am with u on the dance moves. One might say that it sounds like your a biet(spell?)jealous and wish u could do that? If you were to just come out and say you do not like overt sexual beaviour on a dance floor you would sound prudish. I do not know if we would think that. I like to look after my lovers and not become too public with my precious feelings. I think 'the act' may have been unattractive, not the kids. Do you think the y generation will ever catch on to the fact we did it and got over it? That we are all better now? Why does it seem so devo everywhere we go too? A disco for devos, and special disco for you and your lovely friends, can we come too? I'll brush my hair.