Thursday, June 22, 2006

Poop in a bottle

This is an actual conversation I had last weekend. First a little background. Speaker A is currently 27 years old, and when he was 9, he had an accident in the car. He told the driver that he had to pee, but the driver didn't believe him, so he pissed himself. Speaker K is his sister. That being said, here was my conversation:

A: I have to poop.
Me: Right now? 'Cause I know how you have a problem with holding it in the car.
A: Well, I can hold it. And if not, I have this Snapple bottle.
Me: What are you going to do, shit into a Snapple bottle? That would be a neat trick.
A: Yeah, I suppose that would be hard.
K: You could shove the bottle up your ass so you don't miss.
A: Ewww... that's disgusting.
Me: So shitting in a Snapple bottle is ok, but shoving it up your ass first is not?

On a totally unrelated note, I have that little weather thing in my firefox toolbar, and normally it shows a little sun or a cloud, depending on the forecast (that's pretty much all we get here in the Bay Area, a sun or a cloud). Today I got a new icon that I had never seen before -- a thermometer that is on fire.


The Husband said...

i love snapple. the two guys who created snapple are from the place i was born...thus snapple and i have a lot in common. my favorite kind is Fruit Punch but its so fucking hard to find. very few places carry it so when i do find it...i get about as excited as a little girl on xmas eve.

oh, todays weather in Richmond VA is 97 fucking degrees. the humidity is insane. INSANE. i covered my nut-sack with tons of powder today.

slappy said...

You should try Hawaii - they love the fruit punch there. No one knows why.

amera hearts said...

i loved that conversation. it was so funny.

ps. my mom says it is unbearable hot in cali. i think i've gotten accustom to seattle weather because i think 80 degrees is hot now! heehhe, have fun in the triple digits!

amera hearts said...

ps. does my neck look abnormally long?!?!?!

Nick said...

This is the greatest story ever told.

jiggs said...

i'm sorry booty, but shoving a bottle up your ass is way more disgusting that shitting into it.

Unfortunately, with the bumpy road and what not, I would be surprised if this other person could shit into a bottle without causing a huge mess.

also amera, 89 degress was the high in berkeley.

Brookelina said...

It must be because of this.

jamwall said...

i love it when you talk about poop..

Lee Ann said...

Too funny!
We hit 100* today!!!!! And it's only the beginning of summer!

Nick said...

Amera - I never felt comfortable bringing this up, as I didn't know you, but since you brought it up it's not as weird. Your neck is incredibly long in that picture. Couple that with your hotness and I thought your picture was vampire porn.