Monday, May 29, 2006

I got fucking shot!

I was walking down the street yesterday minding my own business. I was even being nice to the cars letting them turn and shit when I got hit in the fucking arm by a paintball. It didn't hurt hardly, but it's the principle of the thing.

Ironically, this is the second time I have been hit by something while on the street. The first time I was standing in a parking lot and got hit by a lemon. At least those pricks had a little imagination with the whole drive by fruiting thing.

But these pricks with the paintball gun... I hope they get hit in the face with a two by four. Or at least castrated so they can't raise little pricks of their own.

14 comments:

Spinning Girl said...

WTF?!?!??!!?

Lee Ann said...

How in the world can this happen, where are you hanging out Jiggs?

Well, it could be worse, right!

Nick said...

I read the title and I said "Finally!" and then I read the post and I said "Ah, damn."

The Husband said...

i have a great story. this past weekend i was visiting the san fran area. my asshole friends i were bored so we got in the car and decided to go for a ride. my one friend noticed a paintball gun in the back so we decided it would be funny if we shot random people. the first guy we saw, was walking down the street. he seemed pretty polite, letting the cars turn and shit. we thought to ourselves...what a perfect target. we nailed that bastard right in the arm! it was great.

Tits McGee said...

"Drive by fruiting" will have me laughing for hours.

miss kendra said...

will you be alright? do you need medical attention?

should you be medevac-ed?

i'm on it.

jiggs said...

spinner: I thought the exact thing when I got hit. but I'm better now.

lee ann: it happens all the time when you're living on "da streetz"

nick: In your face, you whore.

carl: CARL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tits: While I came up with that joke independently, it turns out that it was in that movie mrs. doubtfire.

miss k: I'm ok. the bruise is hanging out below the skin right now. Soon it will come out to play.

slappy said...

That's how we roll in Downtown Berkeley, motherfuckers. Woo.

Jiggs is just being brave for you, Kendra. He needs your sweet, sweet loving. And possibly an advil.

Rich said...

I had a friend who claimed he was shot on the street by a pellet gun once, the purported 'wound' turned out to be a sebaceous cyst. The lying, disgusting freak.

Is there something you want to share?

Ɯbermilf said...

Are you okay?

Because I need to know if it's okay to make fun of you or not.

Sysm said...

You need to retaliate on those punk-ass paintball bitches. Kick it up a notch, and use oil-based paint.

And for the fruitflickers, I recommend using a bungee based pineapple catapult.

Kill 'em with citrus. That's how I roll

jiggs said...

rich: you bastard. you found me out.

uebermilf: I'm a-ok mon cherie

sysm: you're a bad-ass motherfucker sysm.

Booty J Patrol said...

Jiggs, I have to come to Berkeley so I can see this wound. I think I'll be coming sometime this week.

jamwall said...

i usually get hit by all items from the food pyramid.

i'm a very well-balanced target..