Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Geddy Lee is feeling Ayn Randy

Some announcements:
  1. For the next ten days or so, I won't be around so frequently. Feel free to weep quietly over this.
  2. Slappy is a figment of my imagination.
  3. I have a small penis.
  4. My housemate claims that she will take a crap and wrap it up as a Christmas present and leave that wrapped turd on my bed for me to find on my return. I hope this happens, but regardless, I'll keep you posted.
  5. I changed the subtitle on the blog from "buckets of impotent rage" to "a haven for intellectuals all trying to impress each other with their wit"
  6. I currently think everything is reducible to sex. Isn't that right, uebermilf?
  7. Sysm is a douche. While I could explain why I think this, it's just not worth it.
  8. My canker sore is on the road to recovery. SUCK IT, SUBMANDIBULAR SALIVARY GLAND!
  9. My penis is small.
  10. I need attention.

I leave you to ponder whether Tony Danza or Bruce Springsteen is the gayer boss...


Zombie Lou said...

Lou Reed feels sad about all of this but doesnt know why.

Brookelina said...

You dissed the Boss. 30 lashes with a wet noodle for you.

Word verification: fatvrpg - fat voracious pig

miss kendra said...

i'm sad.

and i regret to inform you that based on these photos, tony danza is indeed the gayer boss.

by FAR. i mean the man barely has hair in his armpits.

sure sign.

Übermilf said...

Jiggsy baby
Slip a midget under the tree
For me
I've been an awful good girl
Jiggsy baby
And hurry down the chimney tonight

Sysm was just messin' with you. He's not a douche.

Fred said...

they both play bum fun together. look at that fucking bandana for gods sake.

Monkey said...

I can see Mr. Danza's package. He is the gayer of the gayest. I need an eyewash.

If a poopie ends up on your bed, I want a photo. Please. We will miss you while you are gone. Purple and I will toast with a penis shaped glass of eggnog in your honor.

Nick said...

Ubermilf - That doesn't detract from Sysm's douchey nature. Oooh Burn!

sysm said...

I pronounce it "doo-shay"

Übermilf said...

I guess Sysm IS a douche.

My mistake.

murry said...

why do you keep taunting me to the point of vulgarity jiggs!

as you've now announced it to the world at large, what choice do you leave me but to, in fact, leave some form of a giant poop on your bed?

rest assured though... i will seal the moisture in with a zip lock bag before wrapping. i certainly wouldn't want any seepage to sully your pristine sheets:)

now get out of the house... i have some "work" to do...

Lee Ann said...

I vote Tony Danza, waaaay more gay!

The Husband said...

tony danza all the way. that guys is queer like a $3 bill.

Tumbleweed said...

I am weeping endless tears...mostly about your penis size, but I will miss you too!

I vote Tony Danza all the way. Why do you think Danny Pintauro(Jonathan) from the show ended up to be such a flamer. I'm sure Tony had some "influence" in that area.

Fred said...

i want one of those tattoo's like ghandi had.


no one thought he was gay.

Malicia said...

I like small pricks...call me

jiggs said...

louis reed: You're back I see. Were you kidnapped by the spirit people?

brooke: Sometimes I think the Boss can just suck it.

miss k: tony danza was a boxer for a while. I wonder if he shaved them for that. But regardless, I agree. He's gayer.

milf: Dammit. I forgot to record me singing your christmas carols and now I won't have access to a machine that can record them for me.

With respect to sysm, I know a douche when I see one.

freddy: You're back! Gandhi was pretty fucking hardcore. You should have seen his bitches. Also he drank his own pee.

monkey: if there's poo on my bed, I'll take a photo and post it on the blog.

nick: You know what I'm talking about.

sysm: You know what I'm talking about.

murry: I can't believe you're showing your face around here. After threatening me with poo juice! In case you're wondering everyone, murry is my housemate.

lee ann and carl: gayer than a picnic basket?

tumbleweed: You bring some insight to this issue. Little Jonathan turned out to be super gay (good for him). But Danza's gayness couldn't have hurt that process.

malicia: I both have a small prick and am a small prick. enjoy.

Booty J Patrol said...

I didn't even realize "murry" read this blog until "murry" posted that comment.

Hi "murry"!

Brookelina said...

Jiggs!!! I'm shocked and horrified!!! Even more so than when I saw your teeny tiny penis!

Spinning Girl said...

I love that Elton John song about Tony Danza.

Monkey said...

There's an Elton John song about Tony Danza? Oh... dur. I get it now. I had to type it to see it. Excuse me please while I soak my tiny head.

sysm said...

I hereby, in a public forum, apologize for calling you a wanker. I have no knowledge of you wanking. And I regret if I did imply that you have handled your penis in that way. If you – or your penis - were offended in any way, I am truly sorry.

Lee Ann said...

Jiggs, how is your mouth feeling? Hope it is better!

jamwall said...

god that's the gayest thing i've ever seen..

spank me...

jiggs said...

Brooke: Some of the Boss' music I like. But he's turning into Bono. And that just isn't good. He'll start wearing blue sunglasses. Mark my words.

SG and Monkey: I don't think I get the Elton John thing. As I said to Malicia yesterday, your humor is too subtle for me.

sysm: I'll admit, I was mildly annoyed by you calling me a wanker. I accept your apology. However, my douchedar is still registering in your direction. So I'll be watching you sysm. Have I mentioned that I'm a douche too?

lee ann: canker is feeling better. Thanks for asking.

jamwall: If I spank you, will you poo?

sysm said...

In addition to being a douche, I am also a Pepper.

Wouldn't you like to be a Pepper, too?

Spinning Girl said...

I believe the line is, "Hold me closer, Tony Danza..."

jiggs said...

sysm: unfortunately spicey foods give me gas.

spinning girl: ahh.