Monday, November 28, 2005

You all should be ashamed of yourselves

Hi. I'm new to this blog, but I'm already disgusted. Everyone that contributes and reads this blog should be ashamed of themselves because this blog is disgusting. It contributes to the delinquency of everyone that reads it and I for one feel uncomfortable just being associated with it.

Unfortunately, as you might have guessed, until my request for a transplant is approved I'm stuck here.

34 comments:

Friends of McDougal said...

I was afraid of this eventually happening.

jiggs said...

PENIS!!!

I'm sorry folks, I'm not in control of what he does.

He's such a prude!

jiggs said...

McD: It had to happen sooner or later. My penis couldn't deal with not being able to get its side of the story out there.

Calzone said...

I'm not used to talking to your penis, it's hard to talk when my mouth is full.

Monkey said...

Your penis needs counseling. I guess you bring a penis to smut, but you can't make him enjoy it.

Charles (Jiggs' Member) said...

Calzone! I have never been in your mouth! Wait. That time I passed out on your couch! Blast you Calzone. I was saving myself!

Monkey: My faithful furry friend. You're not dirty. I agree, though, I do need counseling from all the many years of being in jiggs' pants!

marriedman said...

that is either the most sensual post I've ever read, or the gayest post I've ever read. Either way, I'm hot as fuck right now.

Brookelina said...

This is disturbing on so many levels.

Monkey said...

Oh I do need a bath. Married Man is so turned on right now.

I need a bath because I have boogers and penguin poop in my fur. It's rather uncomfortable. Yes, indeed.

jiggs said...

Thanks a lot guys! (sarcasm)

My wang is in a tizzy now because your of your constant needling.

My tiny little penis is a douchebag.

Monkey said...

Where does your tiny penis want to be transplanted to? I'm curious.

Charles (Jiggs' Member) said...

The ideal penis destination would be someone that doesn't hardly ever have sex, but is well kempt and wouldn't think dirty thoughts all the time. Thus, I'm hoping to be transplanted to Tom Cruise. Apparently Tom had his removed 15 years ago for a part (I believe it was cocktail) and he wants a new one. Not for sex, mind you, but just so that he doesn't have to sit down to pee anymore.

Monkey said...

Obviously you have given this some thought. Tom Cruise is an excellent choice. Your back up choice could be Rodin. He's dead, but you can't have everything.

jiggs said...

All my penis does is think. I wish that little thing would at least try to do something else!

jamwall said...

ever think of purchasing a detachable penis?

Lex said...

It's good to be ashamed of yourself. Isn't it.

I like disgusting, disturbing stuff. Makes you think life is worth living.

The more disgust the more interested I am:)

Lex said...

Oh my I just saw all this penis talk. Love it. Must read it all again.

Hmm, to bad I can't say anything really about a penis, as I do not have one myself. I have one of those things they call a vagina.

Yes a vagina, say it again. V A G I N A

jiggs said...

Jamwall: I wish I had a detachable penis. Then I could leave this square I have on a streetcorner somewhere to fend for itself.

Lex: Preach it! Not all bloggers out there share your openmindedness. Some folks are uptight and don't like penis talk.

Monkey said...

P-E-N-I-S.

V-A-G-I-N-A.

H-O-O H-A-H.

Hooked on phonics worked for me.

Charles (Jiggs' Member) said...

Have you turned against me monkey? Why does almost everybody like Jiggs and yet no one likes me?

Monkey said...

Jiggs' penis: this is the problem. You are a might... constipated. I suggest opening your heart and your one little eye and taking in all the world has to offer. If you get a few diseases, so be it. Live a little penis! Be proud! Fulfill your purpose. Your special purpose!

jiggs said...

I think my johnson should certainly follow monkey's advice. But to be honest, my wang is pretty stubborn. Once something pops into it's head, it's very hard to get it to backdown.

jiggs said...

By the way, monkey, that was a mighty fine the Jerk reference

Monkey said...

Well, if your wang doodle is determined to transplant to Tom Cruise then so be it. You can join me in the Males with Hoo Hahs revolution.

Melliferous Pants said...

The ideal penis destination would be someone that doesn't hardly ever have sex...

I'm fairly certain your boss doesn't have any sex.

Charles (Jiggs' Member) said...

Monkey: Being Tom Cruise's wang would be so dreamy!

Pants: How did you know my boss, Penis Overlord Johnson, has taken a vow of celibacy? Are you psychic?

Slagothor1 said...

Is that really a penis?

Oh wait: word ver is "frsknody"

Foreskin Odie.

Fuck me in the caboose! Is Garfield involved? Wait. I didn't mean that like it sounded. I was trying to coin a wonderful euphemism, er, no, not that. An Aphorism? An aphrodesiac? You know what I meant.

Lee Ann said...

Jiggs, that's ok, I have heard about your tongue, sounds like it makes up for it.

Baby, you drive me wild!

jiggs said...

Slagathor: That really is my penis. Watching him type is pretty disgusting.

Lee Ann:You're my rock! I'll be counting the days until you get back.

Searching said...

Jiggsy, I've started blogging again and I'm going to add you to my list of blogging buddies...awww...did you know that your blog is the only one I know that is blogged by my censors at work. I get a message saying that I'm trying to access inappropriate material everytime I try and access it. Crazy.

PS - I want join the league of blogging justice or whatever the fuck you homos call your circle-jerk club.

allison said...

i'm ashamed of nothing

except the fact that I own a book about the Backstreet Boys. I know I know......but it was 1997.

jamwall said...

jiggs euphemism is also equipped with a death ray.....a really lame one.....he just gets people all sticky..........before that he keeps asking people to rub him...

i hate him for it!!!

jiggs said...

Coops: Rock on.

AP: I want it that way!

Jamwall: It's really less of a death ray and more of a sick hose.

Fred said...

man i take a day or two off and i miss the unveiling of jigg's wangola.

thats makes me sooo mad!