Monday, November 14, 2005

The Blog {Vigilantes | Affiliates} {? of Justice}

Here I'm going to synthesize some of the ideas that have been tossed around regarding the comment bombing gang and suggest that people weigh in on them.

Regarding the name of the group:

The original suggested name was "the blog vigilantes", but that seemed a little too boring to me, so I suggested "the blog vigilantes of justice" to tritely remind people that we aren't just thugs, but rather people that care about justice. Then the wedding party guy mistakenly typed "the blog affiliates of justice" and this amused me greatly because it sounds like it ought to make sense, but doesn't really. Thus I like that one, but don't really give a shit. Does anyone have a preference?

Regarding the gang colors/sign:

Nick suggested that we have a gang symbol/icon that we could each put on our blogs which would let people know who they were messing with. I think this is a great idea. In fact, I think the balkanization of the blogosphere is a tremendous goal that we should all work for.

Further, the icon could link to a central blog so that people could find out more and join if they wished. In some ways, it would be like the Half naked thursday thing except with less nudity (unfortunately).

Regarding karma

Whether we were the ones that made the casual friday guy hang up his spurs or not, there has been some discomfort about the negativity associated with viciously and repeatedly insulting a blog that didn't incite such an attack. To offset such negative karma, the suggestion made by mcdougal and others is to do positive blog comment bombing in which we heap praise upon an unsuspecting blog. This sounds like a grand idea to me.

Regarding logistics

For a group to be a functioning unit, there needs to be both leadership and clearly defined guidelines for the average joe comment bomber to follow. With respect to leadership, I suggest a ruling leadership tribunal containing an odd number of the original gang. For example, if the tribunal was size 3, then presumably uebermilf, calzone and nick would be a good combination to balance out women, men and stuffed animals.

As for guidelines, we need to set up things like: an official day of the month for attacks to occur on (let me suggest the second wednesday of each month to honor the day of the original attack), a hazing ritual of some sort (for example self-flagellation), some sort of pledge and an official gang charter.

Remember that everything I suggest here is exactly that: a suggestion. The goal of this post is to initiate discussion about what the blog {vigilantes | affiliates} {? of justice} should do. Thus if you think I suck, let me know. Also if you think anything I suggested here sucks, express yourself.

64 comments:

Melliferous Pants said...

...suggest that people way in on them.

Don't you mean weigh?

jiggs said...

That's what I get for not proofreading. It's now fixed.

Übermilf said...

Everything sucks but David Soul.

Lo, he is like unto a God.

I'm still looking for a worthy recipient of positive feedback. A while back I came across the online journal of a woman dealing with her disabled child.

She was upbeat and loving, and it made my cynical UberHeart melt.

Übermilf said...

Oh, I like Blog Vigilantes of Justice.

BVoJ.

Calzone said...

I like it and I don't. I hate organized groups. I liked our sense of unorganized mania. Also my main goal is to be absurd. I could care less about Casual. To me it is obvious that I am joking when I say something because it is so over the top. I don't want to be thought of as a hater, I'm just a prankster...make sense?

To be clear I didnt want to repeatedly insult and viciously attack casual Friday. I just really like talking to Married Man Chang about sucking his cock.

Übermilf said...

Prankster...well, then why limit our comments to either attacks or support?

They could be totally odd. Like, we could take over someone's blog comments section as Star Trek geeks or whatever personae we want.

An example:

"This blog reminds me of the episode of Star Trek where..." and the rest of us piggy back, and start talking about Star Trek. Or The Food Network. Or orchids... or whatever.

jiggs said...

Calzone:

What would be more absurd than intentionally trying to balkanize the blogosphere into enclaves complete with their own leadership, gang icon and charter?

There are many ways we can prank a blog without being mean at all. To give a lame example, we could all comment bomb with quotes from a movie or some such shit. So if the goal is to merely be weird/absurd, we should rethink the approach altogether I think.

jiggs said...

ubermilf and I had the same thought at the same time. that's creeping me out.

Übermilf said...

Thank you?

jiggs said...

Uebermilf:

I wasn't trying to be mean at all, but it was weird that you and I had the same thought at the same time. It's like some sort of weird psychic connection bulljive.

Lee Ann said...

Jiggs~muffin, you guys have some good ideas.
Know what I think?
I think this is all starting to sound like an episode of Leave it to Beaver!

jiggs said...

You might be right, Lee Ann. After all, I do love the beaver.

Johnny Damned said...

Leave it to Beaver is hot, and you guys are like evil twins Okay I'm down if you guys are. I think the hardest part is find ing the right blog. That dude was perfect.

Johnny Damned said...

Pretend I'm a dragon, sorry I was over there pretending to be a maudlin casual friday fan again.

Lee Ann said...

I see, that has to be true because Wally said so!
Jiggsey, there is that other hot guy, Johnny D.
cya later muffinman

Übermilf said...

I say we find some sappy poetry blog or scrapbooking thing and go off on a wild tangent. There are tons of those things floating around.

Calzone said...

I'm with that. lets go for perplexing, and we have no connection whatsoever. The person will think that their blog just exploded.

jiggs said...

I'd like to post the phrase, "I want a pony" four or five times on somebody's blog.

Lee Ann said...

I want to post "Men have nipples" on people's blogs.

Spinning Girl said...

I just want a fuckin' pony.

Spinning Girl said...

Oh, jiggs, I didn't see your comment before I wrote that. You keep the pony phrase, then. OK, in that case I will write...
Power to the People!

jiggs said...

No wait. What am I thinking? I want to write "My shit is fucking real. I am my own buddha"

jiggs said...

Spinning Girl, you can still have the pony!

Nick said...

How the fuck did I miss this!?

Anyhow, let me weigh in.

I really like your ideas. As far as the name goes I was opposed to "of justice" at first but with your rationale I approve of it. Especially if we are going to be spreading good will as well as smiting the evil.

Zone and I were talking about rolling nOObs in. If people want to join up that's cool but they got to prove they are worthy first. Zone and I came up with a couple idea where the initiate would have to comment bomb someone on their own, say, 75 times and each comment has to be different. and they have to be funny and not ust mean. Or we could go the other way and make them say nice things to someone.

I think we should definitely have a logo or "colors". I will be happy to make something up or if someone else wants to, that's cool to. Also, we need to keep a roster of who has them that way if we come across some little bitch waving our colors we throw down.

I'm in favor of the trubunal. This was something else Zone and I discussed. Multiple leaders is in the best interest of the group and the idea of man, woman, stuffed animal is great (and hilarious!)

I volunteer unless you want to vote.


that is all for now. I can't believe i am just showing up now. Dammit.

Nick said...

Here are a few Logos and such that I worked up. Click on each image to enlarge it.

Suggestions?

jiggs said...

Nick, I really like the icons. especially the one with the unicorn and the one with the "feel our sword" catchphrase.

With respect to the ruling tribunal, I was imagining a system where the tribunal had the real power and I would act in a capacity of a figurehead that sometimes looks like he might have power, but in reality must bow to the often insane whims of the tribunal.

TastyMcJ said...

This blog totally reminds me of this one time in mid-november that i drank a whole bottle of wine and got confused about how the internet worked.

It was a lot like that episode of Star Trek: TNG when everyone was getting abducted in their sleep, and they had to try to reconstruct their communal 'dream' in the holodeck.

Except I don't have a holodeck, and I drank the wine alone, so I don't have a communal dream either.

Then I reverted to my standard response for when discussions come up when I'm not really paying attention:

'Whatever you guys thinks is best works for me; I'm too drunk to care right now, so I'm going to bed"

jiggs said...

I'm brainstorming a pledge:

I pledge allegiance to the club of the blog affiliates of justice. My devotion to the blog affiliates of justice is so complete and engrossing that I will renounce my citizenship and sell my children. I will send naked pictures of myself to the ruling tribunal of the blog affiliates of justice and also to Jiggs Casey. Also TastyMcJ would like some biscuits and I will send him some.

jiggs said...

Tasty changed his mind and decided that he wanted ham instead of biscuits.

Fred said...

the international bloggers united swift fist of justice. i've always wanted to go by that name.

The Husband said...

i'm in agreement with all of your statements/suggestions. since i was involved in the very first hit...does that make me like a founding father of our group? count me in for all of this.

Lee Ann said...

I say yes Carl. You and Jiggs are the ones that must gather the flocks!

Lee Ann said...

Hey muffin, where are you?

Nick said...

we should all get tattoos that say "Feel Our Sword."

Jiggs, you could be our mouthpiece and the tribunal would be the dark, smokey room of actual power.

I likey.

I think the unicorn one is fucking hilarious.

jiggs said...

Carl, you're like the John Hancock of the blog affiliates for justice.

Lee Ann, I right here sweetness.

Nick, I think we're in agreement here.

Lee Ann said...

Muffin ~ I have a stiff, sore neck. I need a neck massage!

jiggs said...

Of course you can get a massage lee ann!

Monkey said...

I always come in at the end of the good posts. Not to suggest that not ALL of the posts here are not genius... but I digress.

I am pleased that the Karma Issue is being addressed. Being a habitually annoyingly nice entity with periods of unfocused and fece oriented rage, I have been worried about my Karma Bank since the Casual Friday incident.

It never occurred to me that he would shut down. Initially it really felt like pulling my pants down in front of Walmart. Would Walmart close if my butt cheeks were firmly pasted against their windows for five minutes? I think not.

Anyway... I will probably participate in positive bombings and bombings that are random. I Ubie's idea of comment thread hijacking. Just plopping in and starting a conversation about Star Trek, anal sex, gardening or rug burns.

However, I will stay away from anything mean spirited.

That said, I love the UNICORN!!

Monkey said...

I meant to say "I liked Ubie's idea..."

Calzone said...

I love the unicorn. I have to say though that I'm not much of a leader. I'm a bit of a loose cannon, has anyone noticed?

Monkey said...

I saw your cannon rubbing up against the woman's ass last night, in a most inappropriate way...

jiggs said...

Don't worry Calzone, I don't expect this to be a task that requires any real work. Loose cannons (you're a sick pervert monkey) are perfect for the job because you never know what sort of insane scheme will catch the leader's eye. Consider yourself to be the nero of the tribunal.

jiggs said...

Hey Nick,

would it be possible to get "Feel our sword" or possibly "feel our horn" at the bottom of the unicorn logo?

How would people feel about that?

jiggs said...

Monkey, I think we are moving towards a position where the blog affiliates of justice won't be mean at all unless someone really deserves it. We just go in and spend five minutes posting insane comments on someone's blog.

Monkey said...

I like insane comments. I like that a lot. Count me in. Insanity is something I can support, and in fact, often do.

jiggs said...

I'm an exploding baby!!!

Übermilf said...

I accept my earlier nomination.

As my first official act, I would like to bar the word "muffin" from being used in an affectionate way.

Also, I think each week should be our "comment bomb" of just wacky comments -- neither uplifting nor mean.

However, if one of us finds a blog in need of either being taken down a peg (Casual Friday) or uplifting comments (the woman with the disabled child), it should be brought to the group's attention and voted upon.

I like the unicorn, and the "feel our horn."

Anything else?

jiggs said...

Uebermilf:

I specifically asked Lee Ann to call me muffin, so as the figurehead, I veto the suggestion that "muffin" not be used in an affectionate way.

However, the rest of that sounds grand.

Right now I'm listening to a little Bone Thugs 'n Harmony

The Husband said...

bones thugs and harmony...now thats old school yo! just the other day i heard warren G and nate dogg...remember that song "Regulators"! we could make that our theme song..."Vigilantes...mount up"

Monkey said...

Although I love Übermilf's cupcakes I must offer my dissent over the muffin issue also.

I vote for Muffins, at least where Jiggs is concerned. It suits him.

My nits are going on the NewsHour with Jim Lehrer. They are tiny, but I will record the program anyway.

Monkey said...

I'm listening to "Gangsters and Thugs" by the Transplants.

The next song I sing will be Nine Inch Nails "The Hand that Feeds".

jiggs said...

Carl: That's fresh, yo!

Monkey: I need a simian backing me up.

I made a mix playlist from the music I played at a cowboy themed party. It's got songs like that Will Smith "wicki wicki why why wild wild west" as well as wild wild west by the escape club and a few marty robbins songs, some willie nelson, some kanye WEST, bon jovi and it ends with "happy trails to you."

There are few things that I take lots of pride in, and making quality themed mixes is one of them.

Monkey said...

I love Quality Theme Mixes. My favorite one from last year was called "Morose Women" and this year's favorite is "Monkey Business".

iTunes has made this pathetically easy for me.

jiggs said...

Itunes is a huge innovation for quality mixes. That Kid Rock song "cowboy" is being played right now. It just occurred to me that the following lyric from the song is hilarious:

"I'm gonna start an escort service for all the right reasons"

I wonder what the right reasons for starting an escort service are?

Monkey said...

Err... money and hookers on call? Just guessing.

jiggs said...

I thought he meant the personal satisfaction of owning your own business... I guess I just wasn't cut out to be a pimp.

Übermilf said...

Okay, muffin can stay for Jiggs. But no lovey-dovey crap in general.

I hate that shit. I'm a cranky old broad. With cramps.

Maybe I'll change my mind when my uterus doesn't feel like it's being squeezed in a vise.

Melliferous Pants said...

The next time I get dumped I'll be calling on the The Blog Affiliates of Justice. Y'all would do a much better job shaking up some jerk than my voodoo doll's have.

Monkey said...

I've found voodoo dolls to be wholly unreliable. We will stand in unity for you Ms. Pants.

Übermilf, although I lack a uterus, my human assures me that putting one in a vise is unpleasant to say the least. She feels your pain and other Clintonesqe murmurings.

Glenn Hopper said...

Holy shit ... look what we've done.

I am now drunk with power.

Where the fuck is McDougal?

jiggs said...

I hate it when I'm suffering from "clintonesque murmurings".

Yes, "Glenn" you should be drunk with your slight power!

Yo "Glenn" have you gone to the casual friday blog recently?

Lee Ann said...

Night muffin!

jiggs said...

Sleep tight, lee ann!

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